roadside_assistance_2

Roadside Assistance Simulator lets you live the thrill of an AAA serviceperson

My sole experience with AAA’s auto folks was when I was 23. My car wouldn’t start after a long day at a research job and I called AAA to give me a hand. I waited and waited. Maybe two hours had passed before that rumbling red, blue and white truck came ambling that way. We gave the car a jump but no dice.

Then he realized that the car was simply in neutral, not park, and that I had wasted everyone’s time. As we spoke, there was a baby trapped in the backseat of a burning Dodge Caravan that would not perish because I forgot the basics of automobile existence. Nonetheless, I think back fondly on our time together.

I can now revisit those moments with Roadside Assistance Simulator, another addition to videogame’s march to completely recreate every experience known to man and sell it the adoring public on Steam. Here’s the pitch from Finnish game studio Fragment Production:

Whether it’s an empty battery in the freezing cold, a flat tire in the pouring rain or an overheated radiator in the scorching sun – your rescue team helps people in need whatever the time, whatever the weather.

Boom. I am sold. And look at this opening screen:

Unlike those other sim hangers-on, there isn’t an ounce of irony here. You know exactly what you’re getting. Magic hour in the windows, a half-full waste basket, a comfortable office chair, and hours of fielding calls from morons like me.

I may not own a car and will unlikely find myself rescuing others stranded on the wayside, but the world needs a hero.